Sorry, I’m a little judgmental.

17 10 2012

I’m just venting a bit here… forgive me.

I just have to say it’s gotten to the point where I can’t read 99% of the fertility forums, boards, etc out there any more.  Why?  Because I’m sick to death of all the young 20-somethings who complain that they’ve been trying to conceive “so long” (for a whole 3 months!)  I’m sick of seeing posts like “My beta is only 2000 on 16dpo, is this ok?”  And maybe you’ll really despise me for this but whatever– I’m so annoyed reading that women are taking every possible herbal/Chinese/vitamin supplement without realizing that they’re probably screwing themselves up and ruining their chances– because those herbs REALLY DO WORK– but they don’t know what they do and they’re adding everything to the pot without knowing what they NEED– and the older women are the worst because their chances are abysmal at best given their age…

Look– just because your brother swears by his blood pressure meds, and your grandfather loves his diabetes meds, and your second cousin has to take antidepressants– you wouldn’t run out and start taking all those meds, right?  So why do all these DUMB WOMEN (yes, I’ll admit I think it’s dumb!) run out and start taking DHEA, vitex, chasteberry, reiki mushrooms, milk thistle, raspberry leaf, blah blah blah?  For God’s sake– do the damn research.  PubMed is a great resource for quality medical research in a searchable format.  Yes, you might have to dust off your reading comprehension skills, instead of asking someone in a forum to spoonfeed you.  Wah-frickin’-wah.

I hate reading posts from women who discuss charting BBTs and say they’re supposed to be 98.6 through the whole cycle till they ovulate and then the temps drop… can we say misinformed?  But it’s not my job to correct their ignorance.  It just makes me cringe.  Or women who talk about their own anatomy and have it all wrong.. like the lady who talked about her cervix being past (on the other side of) her uterus (other way around, sweetie.) 

Really it’s not the women I’m mad at.  It’s the doctors out there.  The sad fact is, we as consumers of medical care must take responsibility for educating ourselves.  We can’t afford to assume our doctors will spend the time to educate us (they might not) and we can’t assume they know wtf they’re talking about (sometimes they’re sadly wrong, wrong, wrong.  Reproductive immunology is a case in point!)  And in this process of trying to get pregnant, we can’t afford to get tired of reading, tired of learning, tired of the push.  Well– if you’re 24 you can.  If you’re 37, you can’t.  The clock is ticking and it’s not your friend.


Thanks for listening.  Sorry for the rant.



2 responses

17 10 2012

Hey I totally get it – and that’s why I stay away from those forums!

18 10 2012

I couldn’t agree with you more. I’m a member of one forum where I swear most of the posters are self-centered, “me, me, me” twenty-somethings whose Mom & Dad pay for everything. It really does put a sour taste in one’s mouth about the infertility community and those of us who’ve struggled for a while. Add in a bit of those who are whining about child #3 or #4 and it makes it even more frustrating for someone like me who doesn’t even have #1 (living at least).

Thanks for posting! 🙂 Love the venting!

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